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Monday, August 27, 2012

A Personal Note

Hi Y'all-
I wanted to share something that happened last night at work..  As you know, I am a critical care hospice nurse and specialize in psychiatric associated cases.  Sometimes, the issues are right there, easily seen--- other times, they are below the surface.  One thing, though, seems to stand strong.... we all die the way we live.
I'm not trying to entice anyone into feeling sad- but encouraging you to be reflective on how we live our life- at home, in public, at work... and in whatever role we chose to partake. Please let me share...
I had this gal- 99 years old with severe dementia and respiratory and cardiac problems.  Her mind was gone and the moment I arrived, she launched into every version of the children's prayer "Now I lay me down to sleep."  As the night progressed, so did the lability of her prayer.  as she started to pass, I began to sing 'Amazing Grace' to her- she joined me and passed within minutes.  Peacefully and with a smile.
It touched me.  Even with the pain, the fear, being with a stranger on her deathbed, she reverted back to a place of innocence and trust.
When I got home, my family lavished me with love.  They know how difficult this type of work is.  John went into Daddy mode and I was able to release my 'adult' and feel the wonder of her passing in the eyes of a child. Nikki held me and gave all kinds of love (I love my little sister) and cried with me- not as a nurse, but as another human being who as given the privilege to share the final moments with a wonderful woman in such a sweet and beautiful way. Nik and I then spent quite a bit of time looking at our own lives, bonding us even closer.
I think that perhaps is the most valuable aspect of age-play... when we adults are permitted to put aside the expectations of society and responsibility, and are free to simply feel, react and enjoy.  Think of this-- how do you live your life?  What will be your reflection in those final moments of life?
I love all of you---- Bree

2 comments:

  1. Thank you - that's a very poignant story.

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  2. Wow- sorry for your loss Bree. Praying for you.

    Thank you again for a glimpse of the ways AP works.

    ReplyDelete